Lasting change. When we or our organization pays a coach, the assumption is often that the results that are generated will last, whether or not that is made explicit. For example, we don't want to see that, 6 or 12 months later, all the work put into becoming a better delegator has become meaningless.
Emotionally-focused therapy (EFT) for couples can help even when there is extreme conflict, but sometimes couples wait so long before seeking help (or find "help" that ends up being ineffective or making things worse) that tremendous damage has already been done to both partners and to the relationship.
It's understandable, although unfortunate, as emotionally-focused therapy for couples is still in the process of becoming better known, and many couples don't realize how different various approaches to working with couples can be.
Have you ever had an employee who, although strong in many areas, even "high potential", received the same feedback year after year about what he or she needed to improve? Or, are you now trying to change your own behavior?
Some issues that even high potential leaders typically grapple with year after year are:
Here is a way to look at coaching and therapy that might be helpful:
It is quite possible to function highly in one domain (work, romantic relationship, family, etc.) and less highly in another. I also assume that how "highly" one is functioning is not an innate trait, but something that can change over time.
Do you have New Year's Resolutions that you are still working on, or that you have already given up on? Are there changes you've been meaning and hoping to make for months, or even years? Often, it's not as much about motivation as about what's been getting in the way.
Harvard professors Bob Kegan and Lisa Lahey have developed an extremely effective method for dealing with behaviors and problems that are difficult to change. They call this method "overcoming immunity to change".
Have you ever thought about what we mean when we way "If I were you, I'd..."?
If I were truly you, wouldn't I do just what you did?
What if we changed the words around and said "If you were me, you'd..."? If you were me, of course you'd do what I would do. The "problem" is, that you aren't me. In fact, if we can remember that, since we are different people, we are quite likely to have different preferences, beliefs, and assumptions, it is less likely to come as a surprise when someone acts differently than we would.
